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Jen Aly, Money Coach for Creatives

A brand of Happily Ever Now, Inc.

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Got money issues or is it really something else?

October 28, 2020 by Jen Leave a Comment

Money issues run deep. They are so multifaceted and multilayered.
The thing is, money issues are not always about money.
self-esteem money coach business coach prosperity
Money issues and financial stress are rampant, and part of that is because money is still the most taboo subject in our culture.
Have you ever noticed that people will talk about sex much quicker than money?
Those of us who have had a challenging relationship with money are not alone.  Basic financial literacy is rarely taught in schools.

Here are some financial stats on how rampant money issues are:

  • According to studies by the American Psychological Association, money issues have topped the charts as the most common stressor among Americans. 72% of Americans say they have felt money-related stress.*
  • Did you know that with the average interest rate for credit cards of 17%, it only takes around 4 years for the amount to double?
  • 44% of Americans do not have enough cash for a $400 emergency.**
  • 33% of American adults have zero retirement savings.**
  • The average American lacks the basic financial knowledge he or she needs to change behaviors and make qualified financial decisions.***
  • Around 50% of businesses make it to the 5-year mark and only 33% are in business for 10 years.****

When you’re making money as an entrepreneur, it’s a different kind of game than if you have a job. There’s no limit to what you can make, and yet it’s all up to you.
Even if you’re making a decent living and you’ve had business training, money mindset may be the missing link for you to go to the next level in your business.
It’s normal to grow for a while and then hit a plateau or ceiling. Things stop flowing as much.
Emotional and mental blocks start showing up and even patterns that you didn’t know you had.
If you want to get to the next level, you must own your worth at a whole new level.
wealth money prosperity hard work
You have to grow your relationship and confidence with money.
It’s not about what you do. It’s about the energy you do it with. Where are you coming from?
If you come from fear or scarcity, then you get more of that.
If you come from prosperity and confidence, then you create more of that.

Money issues are about self-worth.

The truth is, you have to do the work if you really want to get somewhere.
The importance of self-worth has inspired me to create a new version of my money boot camp program. I’ve included some practices, new worksheets, and content that support you to own and live your value. And I’ve added priceless resources.

Are you ready to feel confident in your capacity to own your value and make more money?

If so, check out this powerful program to see if it is right for you: “Money Mastery Intensive Program.”

You’ll get double the content from previous versions of my money program, but the price is the same!
If you are ready to transform your relationship with money, check it out.
If you want to get started on transforming your money issues now, get the Money Makeover Tool Kit or if you already have it, check out this list of amazing books to inspire you toward more prosperity.
Sources:
*“Money Stress Weighs on Americans’ Health,” America Psychological Association.
**”4 Stats That Reveal How Badly America Is Failing At Financial Literacy,” Forbes, Apr 1018.
***Financial Educators Council National Literacy Test Results
****”What Percentage Of Small Businesses Fail — And How Can You Avoid Being One Of Them?,” Forbes, Oct 2018.

Filed Under: Articles, Events, Prosperity and Money Tagged With: business owner, business training, creative business, entrepreneur, financial literacy, holistic business, money issues, money mindset, money training

Why Business Coaching Gets a Bad Rap & How to Hire One

October 1, 2020 by Jen Leave a Comment

An effective business coach works toward your vision, not their own agenda

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

A colleague called me recently feeling deflated after she had received one of those free business coaching sessions where the coach tries to sell you on working with them.

My friend shared with the coach where she was at in her successful practice, impacting many clients, creating new programs, and making six figures, with a goal to double her income.

In response, the coach said, “If that’s where you’re at and that’s your goal, ‘You are playing grossly small.’”

Where the heck did this scale of measurement come from?

This judgment, projection, and criticism are exactly why coaching gets a bad rap. Because the coaching industry has become more about the coaches than the clients.

As soon as coaching becomes about whatever the business coach projects on the client, instead of the clients’ goals and hearts desires, you are in a pool of ego, identity, imbalanced masculine drive, projection, scarcity, and power struggle.

There is a time to call people out for “playing small.” This is when they have a clear desire they are not owning up to, they are limiting their potential in THEIR vision, and there are mental or emotional blocks keeping them from moving forward.

You can say that it’s a limiting belief to not set goals that are triple or more their current income.

I say it’s limiting to compare yourself in a field where the expectations have become to make seven figures to have “success.”

I measure success by how aligned my lifestyle is with my values. Health, freedom, and autonomy are a few of my most treasured values. And quadrupling my income in one year is not in alignment with any of those.

Effective business coaching is client-led. This begins in the sales process.

It is not useful to the client to come from “let me tell you why you need to set more massive goals which I project on you through my ego and scarcity…and then you’ll need to hire me to tell you how to make those goals happen.”

Creating income is a form of freedom and is a valid goal. But to what end? Where are you trying to get to? Here is one of my favorite quotes on prosperity:

“Let go of trying to get more of what you don’t really need. It frees up oceans of energy to make a difference with what you already have. When you make a difference with what you have, it expands. What you appreciate appreciates. You can’t get to prosperity through the portal of more…only enough.” ~ Lynne Twist

The “portal of more” is not enough, never enough. Is $250k enough, is $500k enough? No number is enough when you are looking for external validation and identifying yourself through how much money you make. (Here’s a prosperity practice to feel more abundant.)

This programming is an infiltration from our super-sized consumerist culture.

And I’m shocked to see it in an industry that is known for empowerment and personal growth.

It wasn’t always this way.

Back in 2003, when I became a Martha Beck certified coach, coaching was about supporting people to clarify their values and live within those values, to move through limiting beliefs that were holding them back, and to take aligned action steps toward their authentic purpose.

This was so early in the coaching world, you still had to explain to people in California what life coaching was. It was still new and it was coaching in its purest form. It wasn’t mingled with consulting so much and there wasn’t an established industry culture of what it “should” look like to be a coach. You made it up for yourself.

If you hire a business coach to help you create what they want for you, instead of what you want, you are engaged in a special kind of self-sabotage.

If you decide not to sign up with a business coach you’re not aligned with, you are not “playing grossly small.” You would be playing small if you plugged in to someone else’s vision for you life instead of creating your own.

No where in my coaching training, or any sales training I’ve gone through was I taught to tell the client what they need and then tell them they need me to help them do it.

This is manipulation. In this scenario, the client becomes the coach’s minion. The client ends up trying to create a life or business they didn’t want in the first place because it’s coming from the external instead of the internal.

It doesn’t work. No matter how amazing that coach’s business system or program is, if the vision the client is working toward is not aligned for them on a heart and soul level, it won’t stick.

I’ve seen coaches who were amazing sales people sign on clients who are not aligned, and I’ve seen breech of contract, lawsuits, and drama.

When my clients set goals, I dig deeper to understand what it is about that goal that they want. What is underneath the goal? What value is underlying the desire? Why do they want what they say they want? Is it really their vision or are they “shoulding” on themselves? Are they committed to making it happen?

If the desire and vision doesn’t connect with the client at a deep level, at the heart and soul, it will not only be unsustainable, it won’t flow, and it may even drag them down. This is especially true for people who are already hard on themselves.

Moving to the next level of your life and your business, is about becoming that next version of yourself. It’s about sloughing off all the programming and bullshit stories that you cling to, but are not authentically you. It’s clarifying and focusing on your values and speaking and acting from them.

In order to grow, some people need more pushing. I am not one of those people. My clients are not those people. We push ourselves too much and need to gently integrate the parts of ourselves that create pressure. We are learning to listen to our gut and create more balance and sustainability in our lives.


Before you hire a coach consider these action steps:

-Review their web-site, read their bio, and read testimonials

-Ask colleagues why they have worked with to see if they can refer someone.

-Get to know their approach before you talk with them. Get on their email lists, watch their videos, attend a class, etc.

If you are considering hiring a business coach, ask yourself the following questions:

Why are you looking for a coach?

Where are you now and where do you want to go? Why?

Why is that important to you?

What do you want to get out of working with a business coach?

What would make the experience more than worth the resources you invest?

Once you meet them, do you feel a sense of trust in them? Is this someone you would look forward to connecting with on Zoom or phone often?

What kind of balance of challenge and support works best for you?

When you talked with the coach, did you appreciate their sales process, and did you feel heard?


Some coaches can support you to figure out what you need and if it’s a fit because they ask questions and listen. Be sure you’re clear on the kind of coach you are shopping for, so you become more of who you are in the process instead of giving your power (and money) away.

I’ve seen coaches coach people “into their greatness” but it doesn’t land because it’s a projection and it doesn’t come from the client. I’ve seen coaches who intuitively tell the client what’s best for them, even if the client doesn’t vibe with it. And I’ve seen clients believe what the coach said to them about who they are or what they should want and beat themselves up with it.

This is simply not effective. It’s an ego trip for the coach and any kind of impact is short-lived for the client – if not traumatic with long-lasting impact on self-esteem.

If a coach dictates unattainable goals for a client and the client fails to reach those goals, where does this lead the client?

Right into a puddle of “not enough.”

This is may even be where the client began. Self-worth is such a huge factor in creating and receiving the life you want.

Giving one’s power away to someone else is not the way to build up self-worth.  Instead, it is a vicious cycle that results in one more person having a bad experience with a coach who probably doesn’t even realize what they are doing.

Another reason business coaching gets a bad rap is that some coaches have a cookie-cutter system or a one-size-fits-all step-by-step success path. This model is more about who they are and what they want than what the client wants.

Are you kidding me? Business is not an algebra problem or a fool-proof recipe.

I’ve been in those programs and heard countless stories from those who’ve tried them. They are not effective for everyone because they do not take into account the client’s personality, strengths, weaknesses, etc. Yes, people can learn from them, but the percentage of people who get the results touted in the testimonials is small.

The most effective business coaches are listeners. They listen to clients, they ask questions that pull out the vision, desires, and values of their clients. They challenge and support them to become their best selves. The coaching-client relationship leaves the client feeling stronger, more confident, and more self-trusting. They are more capable and prepared for than they were before they started.

This is why I’m still a coach. The opportunity to connect with and support someone who wants to create more freedom and choice in their life and more value in the world is a priceless gift.

Those who want to evolve their life and/or their business deserve to have support from a business coach that honors and respects where they are at, THEIR vision, and their strengths. No matter what anyone else says.

Filed Under: Articles, Business Tagged With: business coach, business coaching, business owner, choosing a business coach, coach for coaches, goal setting, hire a coach, how to hire a coach, money coach, money mindset, recovering from a bad coach, vision

A Fresh Prosperity Practice and Stress Management Tool for Corona Times

June 2, 2020 by Jen Aly 2 Comments

There’s so much going down in the world right now that I can’t keep up.

And, I’m here to offer what I can. Here is a prosperity practice to support stress management.

One of the biggest stressors right now is uncertainty. And with each day, uncertainty seems to be the most consistent thing…with misinformation, contrasting information, and a barrage of intense major developments that influence each of us on some level.

My experience has varied greatly from moment to moment with the days both dragging on and flying by. I’ve been alone most of the time and have had some very deep and dark moments of clearing and ultimately transformation.

Money, income, and business have been among the topics of conversation for many people. These plus health and safety issues hit some deep places in the human psyche, and bring up stuff for many of us. We are living through a significant cultural, spiritual, collective, and personal shift and even a rebirth.

For me, I hit a whole new level of being in touch with the voices in my mind….and ultimately connecting with my heart.

Frankly, the voices can be assholes and there was not enough of the usual distractions to keep me from hearing them.

One night during full “lockdown” I watched a bunch of tv. I was walking into my bedroom afterwards & I realized I felt crappy. When I inquired what about the feeling, I saw that I had been judging myself for watching so much tv. What the heck? Who cares how much tv I watch during a global pandemic?

I gave myself permission to watch tv. To do nothing. To stare out the window. To sit on the earth for as long as I want. To paint crappily. To thrash dance in my living room to obnoxious music to get my feelings out. To eat more potato chips than usual (even non-organic!) To not shower for three days. Yup. I admitted it. Three. Days.

Suddenly, I didn’t feel so stressed out. I was present with myself, giving myself space instead of having a heavy hand on my shoulder, a critical eye constantly judging me. I’m not used to slowing down. I’m used to being busy all of the time. And that pace had its consequences that my body is still recovering from. This period is an opportunity for me to reboot my nervous system, slow down, connect with myself, heal, and to come more from my heart than I ever have.

We all are having different experiences right now. I wonder how many of you are learning big lessons, deepening your connection with yourself, evaluating your values, and evolving your vision for your life.

Sometimes questions help us see what our desires are, what we value. On my “intake” form for new clients, I ask 5 pages of questions and one question, “What would you do if money wasn’t an issue?” is so interesting and revealing. Often times people say they would relax more, read more, do more self-care, and (of course the popular) travel more. Let’s take out the travel option since it’s not an option right now.

If you say you want more free time but you believe you have to wait until some future point when you’re rich to take a break, think again.

Wait for it……free time is FREE.

I get that if you work to make a living, if you take care of others, if you’re dealing with a global pandemic, you have many hours of stuff to do per day.

And you can still give it to yourself. For real.

How much of that “busy” time is spent doing busy work or spinning your wheels anyway? Or doing the things the pressure to “do more” is telling you to do? What’s more important than feeling free? (even in quarantine)

If you don’t stop, rest, play, and give yourself enough space to get into a variety of brain wave states to allow your intuition and some nourishment to come in, you will not feel prosperous….ever. In my early coaching years, I had an entrepreneurial client who was so rich he was trying to decide between buying a private jet and a professional sports team. He was one of the most unhappy people I’ve ever met. It’s never about the money.

You don’t have to wait.
You don’t have to arrive anywhere.
You can do this now.

This is stretching your receiving muscle and your prosperity muscle.

A lot of times, as entrepreneurs, we have so much pressure in our minds to work more and do more. We don’t actually have/take real free time completely because we’re always putting pressure on ourselves. The voice in the back of our minds is saying “You’re not doing enough” or “You should be doing something more important” or some other version of “not enough.”

When those voices are still present or a part of you is judging what you are doing (or not doing), or you think you are actually procrastinating, you are not able to enjoy and be present, to fully choose what you are doing. This takes away from the present moment and we never get a break, much less feel rested.

I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this. But that thing you’re chasing out there in the future by being super busy…..that’s not where prosperity lives. Trust me, a part of me chased it for a long time. And even when you get the carrot, it doesn’t live up to the expectation you had hoped for.

Prosperity is not in a dollar amount. Not getting somewhere you’re not. Not in doing the perfect thing perfectly all the time. It’s simply a practice of being. It’s only found in the present moment.

So, to practice, give yourself a pass for two hours of “Abundant Free Time.” Practice expanding and strengthening your prosperity muscle to RECEIVE by doing this prosperity practice. Do whatever the heck you want for that two hours and see how you feel. You can even schedule it weekly as a powerful prosperity practice and stress management tool.

For me, as soon as I step in to my “Abundant Free Time” I feel a sense of excitement, curiosity, and relief. I feel less anxiety, stress, and overwhelm.

I may do deep breathing, put on music, draw, paint, dance, stare out the window, sit in a random place on the floor just to see what I notice, pick up a book (or 3 and just peruse), reorganize an area, or tend my many plants. Lately during this kind of time, I commit to staying off of social media. I don’t do anything unless I want to (but I let myself write down anything that I want to remember to do later so I can mentally let it go.)

FULLY give yourself 2 hours of “Abundant Free Time” and see what happens. Receive from yourself as a prosperity practice and see how it feels.

LMK how it goes.

Filed Under: Articles, Inspiration Tagged With: Abundant free time, business owner, corona stress management, covid stress, how to relax, prosperity practice, receiving, stress management, when I'm rich

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